The Importance of Walking

I received this in my email and thought you might get a kick out of it. Since my emphasis has been on exercise lately, I thought it appropriate. enjoy=)

The Importance of Walking

>>>Walking can add minutes to your life.
>>> This enables you at 85 years old
>>> to spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
>>> home at $7000 per month. This is my reason. DWB

>>> My grandpa started walking
>>> five miles a day when he was 60.
>>> Now he’s 97 years old
>>> and we don’t know where he is.
>>>
>>> I like long walks,
>>> especially when they are taken
>>> by people who annoy me.

>>> The only reason I would take up walking
>>> is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
>>>
>>> I have to walk early in the morning,
>>> before my brain figures out what I’m doing..
>>>
>>> I joined a health club last year,
>>> spent about 400 bucks.
>>> Haven’t lost a pound.
>>> Apparently you have to go there.
>>>
>>> Every time I hear the dirty word ‘exercise’,
>>> I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
>>>
>>> The advantage of exercising every day
>>> is so when you die, they’ll say,
>>> ‘Well, she looks good doesn’t she.’
>>>
>>> If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
>>> start with a small country.
>>>
>>> I know I got a lot of exercise
>>> the last few years,……
>>> just getting over the hill.

>>> We all get heavier as we get older,
>>> because there’s a lot more information in our heads.
>>> That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
>>>
>>>>>>> AND

>>> Every time I start thinking too much
>>> about how I look,
>>> I just find a Happy Hour
>>> and by the time I leave,
>>> I look just fine.
>>>
>>> You could run this over to your friends
>>> But just e-mail it to them
>>>>>>>
>>>
>>>>
>>> If you don’t forward
>> this to 1 of your friends within
>>>>the next 5 minutes your belly
>>>>button will unscrew and your
>>>>butt will fall off.
>>>>Really…. It’s true Ha! Ha! Ha!

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I Was Gonna…Eat Right. LOL.

I was all prepared to come on here tonite and tell you all how well I’ve been doing and how much healthier I’m eating now that we’re cooking for ourselves in our new home. I went out to the kitchen to get something to drink before I started on this, and the significant other has made “Cheeseburger Macaroni” Hamburger Helper for dinner! LOL. God Bless him that he cooked while I’m trying to get “caught up” but good grief…

So, at least it’s 1) homemade so it’s not as bad as the 400 calorie cheeseburgers we’ve been eating since we didn’t have a kitchen 2) I’ve taught him we only by skim milk and country crock margarine so at least whatever he cooks is lower in fat. I usually put dried chili peppers on mine to boost my metabolism, but the downside is I like a piece of bread with peanut butter with it.

I’ll figure out the points and calories tomorrow. Luckily I’m not still eating a bagel with whole fat cream cheese and I’m moving around a lot more so maybe I have a little room to spare.

Sometimes I wish I’d been born beautiful and skinny vs. intelligent and oh yeah, beautiful. lol.

When Diet and Exercise Go A Bit Too Far

Madonna Now

Madonna Now

I’m not a big one for following celebrities or pop-culture. I rarely pay attention unless something really special happens and it hits the regular news vs. a magazine or one of those channels like TMZ. I hadn’t really heard much about Madonna since she adopted her last child and I guess I thought she was just a lot less active, kind of grew up and into Mamahood. It turns out I just don’t read the right stuff.

Something that caught my attention this morning though is all the hub-bub on whether she’s healthy or not. As I dug into the story, I was really taken aback by the picture of her. My God, and some people (men) think this is beautiful. Her trainer says she “looks like a 19 year old”. I’ll tell you what, if one of my daughters looked like this I would be taking them to the closest shrink. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200.

Which leads me to the next question. How does she hold onto a 22 year old boyfriend looking like that? I remember when she looked voluptuous, and make up takes care of the rest, but this? She’s over 50 and this looks like going on 90. He must be in it for the money.

I know that a there are a lot of body-building women that would give Atlas a run for his money, but personally I’ve never found that attractive. They end up with no boobs, a body hard as rock, how does someone enjoy cuddling up to that?

I guess this is the flip side of being fat. I don’t find that attractive either, and I guess I would be a poster child for what not to do to keep fit and healthy. I’m glad to know there’s a happy medium for us regular folks. Maybe I’m just a little jealous. I would love to be in the position that people actually told me I needed to gain some weight. LOL

Whale Vs. Mermaid

I received this in my inbox this morning. I don’t know who to give credit to, but I thought it was well worth sharing.

Mermaid or a Whale

Recently, in large city, a poster featuring a young, thin and tan woman appeared in the window of a gym .. It said:

¨THIS SUMMER DO YOU WANT TO BE A MERMAID OR A WHALE?¨

A middle aged woman, whose physical characteristics did not match those of the woman on the poster, responded publicly to the question posed by the gym.

To Whom It May Concern:

Whales are always surrounded by friends (dolphins, sea lions, curious humans).. They have an active sex life, they get pregnant and have adorable baby whales. They have a wonderful time with dolphins stuffing themselves with shrimp. They play and swim in the seas, seeing wonderful places like Patagonia, the Barren Sea and the coral reefs of Polynesia . Whales are wonderful singers and have even recorded CDs. They are incredible creatures and virtually have no predators other than humans. They are loved, protected and admired by almost everyone in the world.

Mermaids don’t exist. If they did exist, they would be lining up outside the offices of Argentinean psychoanalysts due to identity crisis. Fish or human? They don’t  have a sex life because they kill men who get close to them not to mention how could they have sex? Therefore they don’t have kids either. Not to mention who wants to get close to a girl who smells like a fish store?

The choice is perfectly clear to me; I want to be a whale.

P.S. We are in an age when media puts into our heads the idea that only skinny people are beautiful, but I prefer to enjoy an ice cream with my kids, a good dinner with a man who makes me shiver and a piece of chocolate with my friends. With time we gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy. Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think, ¨Good gosh, look how smart I am…¨

I personally am trying to trim down the whale factor, but I will probably never be a mermaid. I thought this was very good. LOL

Am I My Mother?

My mother is 78 yrs. old and her favorite forms of exercise are eating and watching TV. She gave up on herself years ago, has gone through some pretty unhealthy times, and is ready to go home to the Lord anytime he’s willing to take her. Like me she has no desire to exercise, although at least I realize some movement is necessary. If she had her way she would never move at all. I quit taking her in her meals etc. as going to the kitchen was the only exercise she got. It wasn’t far from her chair to the kitchen, but she made the trip several times so at least she was doing something.

We’ve been staying in a hotel recently and the ice machine and dining area are both quite a little distance away. We walk over to the dining area every morning for breakfast, me walking slightly ahead leading the way, her in her walker. She quit putting ice in her water. Too far to walk. Finally yesterday I saw her heading for ice and followed behind her. She did just fine. Coming back however, knowing I was there, she’d pause for a moment and then made a point of letting me know her legs get tired. I don’t know why after all these years she hasn’t gotten it that something like that is just an invitation for me to tell her she needs to move more.

All my life my mother has said she didn’t want to be like my grandmother, who used to sit by the broadband radio listening to police calls all the time, rarely venturing out of her apartment. Now she admits that although she said that, she has actually gotten worse than her mother was. Now as I look at my mother I find myself thinking the same thing. I don’t want to be like her, lazy, fat, no life. I want to “live ’till I die”.

I either fractured my back or tore some muscles in it when we were moving. Oh my gosh, such pain. It’s starting to feel much better after almost 2 weeks, but I realize the most painful time is when I get up out of bed. While I realize many of us get stiff as we get older, making the onset of movement a bit painful, I don’t think that is the problem I’m having. The problem I’m having is the extra weight in my tummy pulling on my back as I lay on my side to sleep.

I’ve heard it said of men that have large stomachs when they see a doctor about lower back pain. Many are told most of the pain would go away if they just lost their tummies. I have no reason to think my tummy is any different. So, while I have always said that I wanted to be a “sexy” senior, for health concerns hitting home it’s about time I decided if I want to be like my mother and miserable, or more like a ‘cougar’, you know, one of those older women that look so good and are so active they go with younger men just to have someone who can keep up. LOL. I think right now I’m heading in the wrong direction.

Weight Loss Tidbits

With all the news about the Swine Flu Pandemic, it’s hard to find too much about weight loss, but I found a couple of things that I thought may be of interest.

This one is a little scary. I guess now that Alli has been released for sale on the European markets, they’re having a hard time getting pharmacists and chemists to follow the rules.

In the US if you go to purchase a bottle of Alli, they are supposed to check to make sure you are over 18 yrs. old and a BMI of 28 or more. Evidently one reporter doing a story overseas is very tiny and a BMI of 18.4 and had no trouble getting Alli at all. They did not give any of the warnings of the side affects like they are supposed to, and they didn’t warn that a person who isn’t overweight taking Alli could develop eating disorders (that one I didn’t even know about).

Change of subject- I guess Lindsay Lohan seems to be going from uncontrollable drug addict and alcoholic, to anorexic. They say she’s losing all the weight to get the attention of her lesbian lover that recently left her. We all find our own motivation in our own ways. LOL.

And last but not least- I’m sure this is a shocker, Oprah.com carries a statement that neither Winfrey nor Dr. Oz has endorsed the sale of acai products for weight loss or other uses. I wonder how I knew that when I was looking at all those sites. LOL

Have a great day everyone, and stay healthy!

A Cool New Contest

Our Lady of Weight Loss

Our Lady of Weight Loss

I don’t know how many of you read Our Lady Of Weight Loss over on Beliefnet, but I just love her stuff. She’s just getting ready to release her second book “All Is Forgiven: Move On” and in honor of that she’s got a contest going. You have to answer the question “Which foods do you find irresistable?” and she’ll throw a healthy snack party for you and 25 of your closest friends.

This morning her blog is about building an “affirmation container”, which I get the affirmation thing, getting your subconcious mind to believe something before it actually happens so that your concious mind makes it happen, but I’m not really sure about this “container”. She wasn’t very explicit about if you’re supposed to cut affirmations and put them in the container, glue them to the container or what.  Usually she writes some excellent and humorous tips and tricks about weight loss. If you go to enter her contest, you might spend a couple minutes reading some of her other posts. She’s really a kick.