The Month After Christmas- New Year’s Resolutions

I found this in my inbox and thought it was so cute, I had to share. I don’t know who wrote it. I would love to give them credit for it. Hope you enjoy =)

Twas the month after Christmas,
and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
not even a blouse.

The cookies I’d nibbled,
the chocolate I’d taste
and  the holiday parties
had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales
there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store
(less a walk than a lumber),

I’d remember the marvellous meals I’d prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I’d never said, “No thank you, please.”

As I dressed myself in my husband’s old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt…
I said to myself, as I only can,
“You can’t spend a winter, disguised as a man!”

So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won’t have a cookie, not even a lick.
I’ll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won’t have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I’ll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I’m hungry, I’m lonesome, and life is a bore…
But isn’t that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.

Advertisements

Still Working On Getting Sexier and Skinnier

fat lady

My cats? LOL

Yes, even though I haven’t been very good about keeping up here, I am still working on getting Older, Sexier, and Skinnier. I’m just not doing it very fast. LOL. Actually I have been losing some weight lately, through no fault of my own. I’ve been losing it because of something I have always known. Because I am moving my body! I am working outside of the computer more. I am participating more in life. Which means I am not sitting on my butt. You know what this means don’t you?

We’re back to freakin’ exercise! Grazing, as they call it when you’re home working all day, and you keep wondering out to the kitchen putting things in your mouth, has never really been a problem, but when I eat, I eat pretty good. Even that would have worked ok if I ever did anything physical, but I don’t. I keep promising myself I’m going to start scheduling it in in the mornings so I get it out of the way, but by the time it’s light I’m already too wrapped up in what I’m doing, and I just don’t do it. Sound at all familiar? LOL. What I have done is join more things at my church, volunteered at a foreclosure center, and actually started living life again. That in itself is burning a lot more calories and fat than I have in the last almost 2 yrs., and I enjoy it. Maybe that was the answer all the time. The only exercise I like is something like volleyball or basketball. It’s kind of hard to find a bunch of fat old ladies like me willing to play. LOL. So this will do for now, and as I get in better shape who knows? Maybe I will be more apt to go for a walk now and then.